“The idea of repression ultimately hurts victims. It reinforces the notion that sexual abuse is and should be a traumatic experience when it happens – something done against the will of the victims.”
No Ms. Clancy, what hurts victims and survivors of incest and child sexual abuse, is people like you, who have degree and a name like Harvard behind them, but who are so blinded by their own ignorance and biases – and maybe even bias because of those who fund their research- that they help perpetuate an atmosphere where those who want to abuse children, will molest them and say, ‘this won’t hurt you’ or `she won’t resist, because she likes it.’ Those who will rape children can say, `no one will believe you.’ (Because after-all, Clancy says child rape, forced oral copulation, and sodomy on a child is rare.)
Ms. Clancy, it was NOT MY WILL to be raped, molested, and abused. No child wants to be raped or penetrated with objects. Their body might respond favorably to on-going molestation (as the abuse progresses into conditioning and a form of `love’), but no child truly wants it because NO CHILD has the intelligent discrimination, or mental capacity to be willingly abused. And children are certainly not spiritually corrupted like adults are. Most children are subtly groomed, so their so-called “free will” to be abused is not their will at all, but a mental conditioning to be abused.
“The kids don’t know what’s going on, and they often enjoy it. They’re not going to resist.”
Clancy is not only unprofessional, her belief system is dangerous.
Clancy was asked, “What do you mean by the “trauma myth”?”
Clancy’s reply: “The title refers to the fact that although sexual abuse is usually portrayed by professionals and the media as a traumatic experience for the victims when it happens – meaning frightening, overwhelming, painful – it rarely is. Most victims do not understand they are being victimized, because they are too young to understand sex, the perpetrators are almost always people they know and trust, and violence or penetration rarely occurs.”
If this so-called mental health ‘professional’ feels that violence and penetration rarely occurs, she ought to update herself to the 20th and 21st centuries. She sounds like the people from the first half of the 20th century, who claimed that incest is rare.
Yes, I experienced pleasure and affection that I received from some of the abuse that I endured by my father, but it was mixed with fear. I knew that what was happening between my father and me was not okay. I knew as a child that it was unnatural. More importantly, I experienced a tremendous amount of pain and fear from being raped at age seven. I didn’t know what was happening to me and I thought I was dying. I could not move because I was being held down and straddled. I screamed for help and no one listened. My vagina felt as if a knife was penetrating it. When, as an adult, I remembered the rape, I re-lived my experience by clenching my teeth in my sleep so hard that I had to have a root canal.
When my father forced me to perform fellatio at age three, I choked, gagged and cried from the pain and confusion. THAT Ms. Clancy is trauma. The rapes, abuse, and death threats induced decades of PTSD symptoms that eventually stopped my life and sent me to countless medical doctors and mental health experts.
Clancy says, “Most victims do not understand they are being victimized, because they are too young to understand sex, the perpetrators are almost always people they know and trust, and violence or penetration rarely occurs. “Confusion” is the most frequently reported word when victims are asked to describe what the experience was like. Confusion is a far cry from trauma.”
To say that violence or penetration rarely occurs is professionally negligent and outrageous, and I have news for Clancy; an adult with bad intentions placing their body or their hands up against, onto, into, or on top of a child is traumatizing emotionally, mentally, and physically. When it is a parent or trusted loved one –it is also a betrayal trauma. Human beings, especially children, have the remarkable ability to block out anything physically or emotionally traumatizing. However, this mechanism only lasts so long and one day the trauma will re-surface. In light of the fact that repression exists, many of the victims, who were interviewed for Clancy’s research, and who didn’t report trauma, may very well be blocking it out. However, because Clancy (contrary to stacks of research and corroborated cases) doesn’t believe in repression, then she didn’t allow for this fact to be included in her study. Thus, her conclusions are erroneous.
Clancey from the Salon.com interview: “Despite all of this media and research attention on sexual abuse for the last 30 years, I still don’t hear the answer to one question: What the…. is wrong with all of these men? Sexual abuse is not women; it’s men. Every once in a while a woman will sexually abuse,…”
This woman keeps getting more ignorant with every comment she makes. “Every once in a while?” Did it ever occur to this so-called mental health “professional” that because there is so much denial within society, and by the victims themselves, and so much deep-seated shame –that most victims of female sexual offenders will never speak about it? Does Clancy not realize that mother/daughter, sister/sister, grandmother/granddaughter incest is not rare but is rarely spoken of by society and by the victims?
“What is going on in society that so many men are choosing to get off on small children? I can find almost no studies on the subject. People will go into jails and interview a perpetrator, but most of these people don’t go to jail, and most of them aren’t caught.”
There are over 60 million survivors of child sexual abuse in America alone. Millions of them have been raped and sodomized, terrorized with objects inserted in their bodies, and forced into oral sex. In addition, 95% of victims never tell anyone, so how the hell can she claim that rape, oral rape, sodomy, violent penetration by men, and sexual abuse by a woman is rare?
Clancy: “….people exposed to horrifying events report that they often remember them all too well. Ask any child exposed to the recent earthquake in Haiti if they “repressed it.” None will. True trauma will always be remembered. “
Any mental health “expert” should know the major differences between what happened in Haiti, and victims of incest who repress their experience: If any child exposed to the earthquake were to be told by their family members that nothing happened to them, and if everyone in their family denied that any earthquake ever took place and acted as if nothing had ever happened while the earthquake was occurring,……and if all records and documentation of the earthquake were sealed, and if no one ever spoke of the earthquake again, I can guarantee you that the child would repress all of the trauma that they experienced, and even that the quake ever happened.
“What therapists in the sexual abuse field refer to as repression is actually simple forgetting.“~ Clancy
Hmmm. My “simple forgetting” induced years of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, abnormal fears, personality disorders, eating disorders, phobias, panic attacks, rage, years of insomnia, nightmares, worthlessness, vaginal pain of unknown origin, jaw clenching, choking for no reason, and an illness that created a whole host of debilitating and frightening physical problems -all of which were a part of my life long before ever seeking therapy. “Simple forgetting” does not induce the hell that I experienced. I have healed from all of these problems. People don’t heal from “false memories.”
To read my original article on this subject, click here