Father Molests Three Year-Old Daughter While Wife Holds Child’s Hand ‘To Ease Her Pain’

My first reaction was a desire to see both parents put to death. My mother was there when I was raped by my father, and I still struggle with that. It is easier for me to admit and come to terms with the fact that my mother sexually abused me, than for me to allow myself to admit that she was there when I was raped.

I know intellectually that I forgive my mother, but my inner child has not yet truly released her anger over this. My initial desire to see these two put to death, came from my subconscious mind (where the inner child still lives and breathes.) Whenever we have an intensely, and out of character, strong reaction to something, it usually means we are reacting from unhealed emotions.

But I began to cry when I read that this little girl was so sexualized that she was dry humping her stuffed animals and wanted to watch porn. This hit me harder because I was so sexualized by my father that I masturbated excessively and wanted more sexual abuse from him.

For a survivor of child sexual abuse, being angry and disgusted at those who harm children is not as emotionally painful as being angry and disgusted at one’s self for having ‘gotten into’ the sexual abuse, craving it, and being unhappy when it ends. I have worked long and hard healing this aspect of the incest. I am not there yet, but close. It takes a very long time and a lot of willingness to see ugly truths about ourselves in order to fully and truly heal those truths…

“A 27-year-old man sexually assaulted his three-year-old daughter ‘too many times to remember’, during which time his wife would hold the toddler’s hand so that it ‘wouldn’t hurt so much’, court documents reveal.

The Michigan man, who is not being named to protect his daughter, has been arraigned on 12 counts of first degree sexual misconduct after it emerged he repeatedly raped the three-year-old, took illicit photographs of her for his own ‘sexual gratification’ and made her watch child porn.

The man admitted to Blackman-Leoni Township public safety detectives Joseph Merritt and Christopher Boulter that he may have attempted to have sex with his daughter six times but that in reality it occurred ‘too many times to remember’.

His wife also admitted assisting her husband while he attempted to penetrate their daughter more than once, holding her hands ‘so it wouldn’t hurt so much’ while he held her legs if she ‘tried to get away’, according to documents.

The graphic details were revealed in a petition filed by the Department of Human Services, which is seeking to terminate his and his wife’s parental rights.

They were living at the Avalon Hotel, 2000 Bondsteel Drive.

The abuse is believed to have begun late last year and continued until May, MLivereports.

It came to the attention of Children’s Protective Services on May 7 when they received a complaint that the toddler was displaying ‘sexualized behavior’ such as ‘humping her stuffed animals’ and asking her brother for sex. She also found a pornography DVD and tried to watch it.

The wife claims her husband would force sex on her and she would physically shake in his presence, according to MLive.

He grabbed her throat once when she tried to stop him physically abuse her sons when they were two and four-years-old and told her if she called police he would throw her out the window.

The man told detectives he is a ‘sex addict’ and has gambling problems. He also said he was sexually abused as a child, as did his wife.

The couple would watch porn and have sex in front of the children.

The toddler’s father wrote her an apology letter, which the petition quotes.

‘If you’re reading this, I am either dead or in jail. I am not proud of being here.

‘I also was touched as a child and repressed its memory as long as I could. When we moved, that nightmare came back and haunted me and I unfairly took it out on you.

‘I am sorry for what I have done and hope that you have a happy life wherever you end up.’

He also wrote: ‘I know you are going to have a lot of questions as to why this happened and I can’t tell you that at this time, I am not fully sure as to why this happened.

‘Please know that I want the best for you and I am going to get the help I need. My head is not right and hasn’t been for a long time.’

The mother has not been charged with any crime as yet but the investigation is continuing”~The Daily Mail

My notes: If the mother was sexually abused as a child. She is a hypocrite for allowing her daughter to be sexually abused and for being there when it happened.

The mother tried to stop her sons from being abused, but not her daughter? This is telling.

I don’t care what happened to her as a child, she watched pornography and had sex in front of the child, and most likely got off on it. She wasn’t forced into anything by this man. She is no victim and needs to be charged with child rape.

I have written an email to the city attorney. If you feel strongly about this case, and want to take action to help stop child sexual abuse, please write the attorney and ask them to prosecute the mother.

Here is my letter. Feel free to use some of my words, in your own style:

I am writing in reference to the case of the 27-year-old man who has been charged with sexually assaulting his three-year-old daughter, during which time his wife would hold the toddler’s hand so that it “wouldn’t hurt so much.”

The Michigan man’s name is being withheld by the press, but you must know who I am speaking of.

My mother held me down while I was being raped by my father as a young child, and willfully allowed the incest to continue for years.

This is a crime against nature and a crime against that child’s soul. I don’t care if the mother in this Michigan case was sexually abused as a child. She is a hypocrite, and should be held even more accountable because she knows the emotional trauma and severe pain that child sexual abuse causes, yet she facilitated the sexual abuse of her own child.

This mother watched pornography and had sex in front of the child, and most likely got off on it. She wasn’t forced into anything by this man. She is no victim and needs to be charged with child rape, child abuse, child endangerment, child abandonment, and reckless indifference.

Charging and prosecuting these kind of women is the only way to help stop these crimes. If you do not charge this woman, you are essentially approving of what she did. If you do not hold her criminally accountable, you are giving the green light to other women in similar situations (and there are countless cases like this) to be silent about incest and abuse, to willfully allow it to happen, help it to happen, and for some women…you give them the okay to take part in the sexual abuse of the child.

Sincerely,
Alethea XXXXX

Update: Here is the proper contact information for the attorney in the case.

Jackson County Prosecutor

County of Jackson

312 S. Jackson Street

Jackson, MI 49201

517.788.4283

________________________________________________

dailymail.co.uk

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6 Responses to Father Molests Three Year-Old Daughter While Wife Holds Child’s Hand ‘To Ease Her Pain’

  1. melissa lee says:

    It is often the parent that the client does not talk a lot about that is the one they have the most issues with, and this is often their mother. When a child is either abused and abandon by the mother, and essential bond is missing from the child that the child longs for, like a hunger, the father, step-father, brother, boyfriend of mothers, the list is really long, then comes in and bonds with the child that is vulnerable thru this missing primal bond, and now, the child is in essence, the lover of the abuser, the mother looks the other way, mainly because she is in denial of her own past, and the abuses she endured, this is a long generational wounding that often goes back 7 or 8 generations and of course, Karmically too… So, I say, the mother should always be held responsible for allowing her child or children to be raped… I dare say, that every other person has been raped, most have no memory of it… xo Melissa Lee

    • Alethea says:

      Melissa Lee! Never truer words written.

      Especially this: “When a child is either abused and abandon by the mother, and essential bond is missing from the child that the child longs for, like a hunger, the father, step-father, brother, boyfriend of mothers, the list is really long, then comes in and bonds with the child that is vulnerable thru this missing primal bond, and now, the child is in essence, the lover of the abuser, the mother looks the other way,….”

      This was my life. I gravitated to my father because my mother essentially despised me, and showed no love. I then became my father’s “lover” and “hungered” for his kind of love.

  2. Tornad0sRul says:

    One of the biggest problems in this Country is the mother. The mother is almost always the closest adult to the child, and they are the most equipped to hide the abuse, and enable the offender. Also, they walk away scot-free every single time. Mothers are never held responsible for the abuse of their children, and that is nothing but a disgrace. Mothers are overprotected and they need to be prosecuted and put in jail. Look at Dottie Sandusky! She heard the screams and she even adopted children for her husband to molest for decades. Dottie Sandusky was well aware of the crimes that her husband committed and she did nothing, absolutely nothing. If it has been a murder that she knew about but said or did nothing she would be an accomplice and given nearly as much prison time as the actual murderer. It makes no sense, and until this country wakes up and start holding mothers responsible for the abuse of their children it will continue. I have noticed that the mere mention of mothers being held responsible invites backlash and anger like I have never seen before. I hear story after story of mothers who “tried their hardest” to protect their child from an offender, but those stories are few and far between, and those mothers care nothing about the children whose mothers purposely look away and allow their child to be abused. Guilt is another reason that mother’s refuse to take responsibility. Mother’s who allowed their children to be abused will go to their grave before they will ever admit that they suspected or knew of the abuse and that traps the victim in a cycle that they cannot get out because they cannot even acknowledge the abuse that their own mother will deny. For every sexually abused child there is a mother, guardian, or caregiver who is responsible for it. PERIOD. Child sexual abuse is 99% preventable! But communities and individuals allow themselves to be “groomed” by offenders because of their own selfishness, and they won’t speak up because of their own selfishness. Things need to change fast and start holding adults besides the offender responsible for child sexual abuse because without other adults helping, sex offenders WOULD NOT BE ABLE TO COMMIT THEIR CRIMES.

  3. Chris and Judy says:

    Thank you so much for all your good work, Alethea. My mother held and comforted and fed me after i was severely beaten by my dad. She had regressed to a very young child state as she nursed me for days. This was the only time she ever expressed physical kindness, affection and nurturing to me, so i thank God for it. Amazingly, as a result i believe, I was able to bond with her and develop genuine love for her, despite her own severe abuse of me. What you and this dear little girl went through is horrible. I am thankful my mother did not send this mixed message, although it was horrible enough to see and hear her laugh at me and mock me as i was raped by her boyfriend…at least that was in some bizarre way “all bad” and easier to dissociate. Thank you for being a voice for those with no voice. Thank God both of us have been able to live, find healing after long, hard searching by God’s grace, and reach out to help others. You are a continuing good example to me. God bless and strengthen you. [ I have been able, through years of work, to confront my mother in some measure, as well as to detach and reset my boundaries to prevent her re-abuse of me verbally and emotionally. ]

    • Jennifer says:

      although it was horrible enough to see and hear her laugh at me and mock me as i was raped by her boyfriend

      Your comment brings to mind a few quotes:
      Man never made any material as resilient as the human spirit.
      Today I want to honor the quality of resilience and the power of the human spirit. It shows what we’re capable of !

      Resilience is the ability to work with adversity in such a way that one comes through it better. It is the quality of character that allows a person or group of people rebound from misfortune, hardships and traumas.

      Much of our resilience comes from community—from the relationships that allow us to lean on each other for support when we need it.

    • Alethea says:

      Yes, thanks be to GOD. For without God, true healing can never be done. I thank God every day, on my knees, for healing me from the hell I have been through in both childhood and adulthood (the aftereffects of childhood incest)

      I have yet to hear from the mother in response to my letter. I realized yesterday that all I wanted was an apology. Her silence tells me that she knows she cannot deny what she did to me any longer, but also that she refuses to humble herself and apologize. because if she did, then she would have to admit she was wrong and risk being put in the spotlight for having sexually, emotionally, and physically abusing a child.

      Thank you for all your kind words. Peace and God Bless you both.

      Alethea

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