Self-Injury and Self-Punishment Are Often a Way of Life For Sexual Abuse Victims

March is self-injury awareness month. This is a re-publish from 2012…

Self-punishment, self-injury and self-sabotage in relation to having experienced pleasure during child sexual abuse is highly common.

This behavior can be linked to:

  • For women –feeling our father, brother, or step-father was our boyfriend and sex partner.
  • Having had orgasms with the perpetrator
  • The perpetrator behaved as though the victim is the sexual aggressor (to protect himself) and the mother often blames, abuses, or strikes at the child because they WANT to believe the child is at fault.

Throughout the latter part of my healing, I endured a tremendous amount of self-inflicted punishment for wanting to be with my father sexually, or for the times it felt good, or when I received attention and affection when he molested me.

People who self-punish often deprive themselves of things they enjoy –like the enjoyment of food, or by avoiding activities that make their heart sing.

More painful forms of self-punishment can be things like “accidentally” hitting yourself in the jaw, slicing numerous fingers with a knife or cheese grater while cooking, frequently bumping your head head, dropping breakable items, or biting your own tongue.

The most common form of self-inflicted physical harm is known as “cutting.” It is sometimes called “self-mutilation” or “self-abuse.” Cutting is usually carried out with a knife or other sharp object. It is estimated that fifty percent of those who commit this type of self-injury were physically or sexually abused as children.

Adult survivors of child sexual abuse inflict wounds on themselves for a number of different reasons. Each person is unique. However, self-harm can be associated with trying to fix what is “broken” inside. Sometimes it is done in order to stop emotional suffering, and instead, feel physical pain.

Self-injury can be done to release rage because the person cannot verbally express their emotions. Watching the blood for a while is common. The blood can be symbolic of feeling unable to express emotions in a normal manner. One woman who cuts herself said, “I wanted to make visible what I felt inside.” This is just another reason why it is crucial for victims of abuse to verbally express themselves.

Psychotherapist Steven Levenkron, M.S. and author of the book Cutting found that as much as ninety percent of those who self-injure came from families with a system of denial and from families that avoided anything unpleasant. These types of households usually deal with problems in silence. This lends support for the theory that the number of sexual abuse victims among those who cut themselves is probably much higher than what is reported. Families with a significant system of denial are ripe for an incest victim to develop Dissociative Amnesia (repressed memories) for trauma and sexual abuse.

One woman told me that just before she cuts herself she experiences extreme anticipation that is exciting, dangerous, and sexual. Feeling excitement while cutting may be a way of punishing herself for enjoying the sexual stimulation with her abuser. For this woman, the danger, sexual pleasure, and the excitement, may have brought deep shame about enjoying what her rational mind told her she should not have liked.

Women I spoke with who perform self-injury said this form of violence is often a way of trying to remove the part of them that initiated the guilt, trauma, and suffering. They are literally trying to cut out what they feel is the cause of their grief. They try to sever the genitals or breasts like they are trying to amputate an arm or leg.

Van der Kolk did a study on patients who had problems with self-injury. Each subject indicated that a safe environment in therapy, facing the truths about their childhood experiences, and how they responded to those experiences, are what helped them become strong over their memories and what enabled them to stop the self-mutilation.

People who have been sexually abused as children cannot fully heal without dealing with any shame, guilt, and self-worth issues related to having taken pleasure in some of the sexual acts, or having had orgasms with their perpetrator.

Please know that you are not alone. Countless victims experience this –probably most victims do.


Hearing the Survivor’s Voice: Sundering the Wall of Denial, Sandra Bloom, Journal of Psychohistory, Vol 21, Number 4, Spring 1994, page 467]
Self-injury Poorly Understood Problem, Dana Sullivan, September 5, 2000, Web posted at: 1:28 PM EDT (1728 GMT), Copyright 2000 by Healtheon/WebMD
The Compulsion to Repeat the Trauma Re-enactment, Revictimization, and Masochism, Bessel A. van der Kolk, MD Psychiatric Clinics of North America, Volume 12, Number 2, Pages 389-411,
June 1989.
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Bruce Jenner: Guilty of “Man Slaughter?”

This is part three, in a three-part posting of articles having to do with ‘transgenderism.’ The reason I am posting these articles is the shocking nature of the stories –especially Bruce Jenner’s story– and because of the influence he, and others, can have on the minds of innocent children.

–Bruce Jenner, former Gold Medal winner in the decathlon in the 1976 Summer Olympics, was once an archetype of masculinity.

bruce_jenner_custodyJenner adorned the cover of a box of Wheaties Cereal and was featured on the cover of Playgirl.

Today, Bruce Jenner wants to ‘become a woman,’ and faces manslaughter charges in the death of 69 year-old Kim Howe, who was traveling along Pacific Coast Highway in Malibu California on February 7th of this year when Jenner slammed into the back of her vehicle. Ms. Howe was pushed into on-coming traffic, struck by a large SUV, and killed.

spl943664-001A mass-transit bus captured the crash on video, and the evidence shows that Jenner was not in control of his vehicle, and was either traveling too closely behind Ms. Howe, or was speeding.

There is a pending investigation by the Malibu Sheriff’s Department, but Jenner could face manslaughter charges, in the wake of reports that he has recently had facial reconstructive surgery to look more feminine, and that he has been growing breasts, and dressing like a woman.

Jenner is also reported to have taped an interview with 20/20‘s Diane Sawyer, which has not aired yet, but will allegedly disclose his decision to take hormonal drugs, and have some kind of ‘transgender surgery,’ to “become a woman,” –most likely involving the self-mutilation of his sex organs.

If true, the interview will most likely glorify, normalize, or even encourage transgenderism, and will be part of the on-going mass movement to symbolically slaughter the role of men and their masculinity.

No matter what the media, or feminists, or Hollywood, or the ‘socially correct’ crowd tells society…no human being can “change their sex.”


Bruce Jenner is a man, and will always be a man. He was born with male chromosomes, and no amount of self-mutilation by having surgery procedures done on his sex organs, will change that fact.

Self-mutilation via surgery, hormonal and other dangerous prescription drugs -in order to identify with the opposite sex (or to lie to one’s self with transgenderism)- are all merely a cover-up for deep psychological neurosis, or emotional pain and trauma, and it is often not consciously remembered by the person.


It is horrific that Jenner and the media want to promote this monstrous act he is planning –promote it as a natural, normal thing that children ought to also do one day if they happen to be sexually confused inside themselves –confused for psychological reasons that have been deeply embedded into the subconscious mind of the person, or child.

Bruce Jenner needs to face his neurosis, any past trauma, or any kind of emotional need that has made him identify with the opposite sex.

Just like Chaz Bono, Bruce Jenner is no role model for children. He needs to be kept away from children’s minds. Jenner is NOT a woman -in his head, or otherwise. He is a man who needs serious psychotherapy to find the root cause of why, as a child, he felt feminine, or related to the women in his childhood. He may have even been sexually abused by someone as a young boy.

Bruce Jenner, because of his psychological state. might also be the cause of the death of the woman he rear-ended in the car crash.

Jenner says he “felt like a woman” since he was age five.

Children at that age have no rational understanding of sex, so his childhood feelings could very well be rooted in some kind of need for attention, which he might have seen his two sisters receiving more of –or possibly Jenner saw that the women in his family could do things he could not, like with their hair and clothing. It is possible that, as a child, he wanted the ability to act and look female.

This childhood experience is not synonymous with the need to have sex with men, or to cut off your genitals, and grow breasts.


Maybe his father paid more attention to his sisters –and he craved his father’s attention? Who knows? Parents, siblings, and other relatives, can have very powerful influences on children, and those experiences and feelings embed themselves into the subconscious mind of the child, and remain there as an adult.

Bruce Jenner was once an attractive man, and a strong male athlete when he was young, so any need for attention, and self-aggrandizement would have been fulfilled during his career as a young, famous athlete.

But what happens to a person, who has an attention-deficit neurosis when they begin to age so much that they can no longer attract sexual, or athletic, attention to themselves?

–Especially notable is Jenner’s role in the television reality series, Keeping Up With the Kardashians which I have never seen, but my guess is that Bruce is downplayed and minimized by the young, attractive women on the show.

What better way for his subconscious mind to gain that needed attention, and to fulfill an emotional need to be a woman, than to go through hormonal and surgical changes, and to announce on National television, that you are going to “change your sex?”

Interestingly, after Jenner’s world-wide success at the Olympics, his little brother was killed in a car crash. It is highly possible that the attention Jenner received for being an Olympic Gold Medal winner, was taken away from him -within his family dynamics- when his little brother was tragically killed.

Evidence of Jenner’s ego-driven mind can be found at his future website, where he calls himself, “the world’s greatest athlete.”

I fear that his future website was meant to promote transgenderism and to influence the minds of children who would have looked up to him as a role model. If so, the car crash put that on hold.

Modern-day neuroscientists are discovering the power of the subconscious and how much it drives, and can control our lives. The subconscious mind drives most of our actions and decisions. An unhealed subconscious mind can cause illness and disease, and serious psychological disorders, and can even cause a person to have a car accident.

Jenner’s soul is tortured. He needs to find the root cause -in his subconscious mind. The car crash may have been his soul’s warning flag that he is NOT at peace, and in great turmoil inside himself and either wants to die, or wanted to try and stop this insane idea of ‘becoming a woman’ through self-mutilation and to stop it in any way he can…even by subconsciously getting into a major car crash.

But most people are not willing to truly look into the darkness of their own soul, and most do not have the courage to face that darkness, and then to heal it in a true, dynamic, and natural way. This is because it takes hard work, time, and a willingness to face one’s deepest secrets and most devastating emotional pain.

Cutting up one’s body, and taking drugs are easier, faster, and they cater to the disturbing world we live in –a world where the false idea that our bodies, desires, emotions, and elemental nature are ‘who we truly are,’ and this belief has been instilled into the minds of Americans through people like Lady Gaga, Madonna, the mainstream media, feminism, the gay and lesbian movement, Hollywood, and by entertainment and fashion magazines.

Even your own tax dollars are contributing to the promotion of transgenderism, gay and lesbianism, abortion, and sexual promiscuity for children in organizations funded with U.S. Government Grants that directly target the youth.

bruce-jenner-hair-browny-locksNo one can say what the root cause of Jenner’s issue is, but Bruce Jenner’s soul knows, and the only way to penetrate the soul is by delving into the subconscious mind.

Every human being has the potential to go within and become self-aware, and heal themselves, and every person has the ability within themselves to become powerful human beings –but with their inner God-given power– not with drugs and surgery, or debauchery and self-indulgences.

Bruce Jenner is just one more tortured soul, who is told by certain groups with a monstrous agenda, and told by the mainstream media and by dangerous psychologists, and by the entertainment industry that he should commit public mutilation instead of going within his own subconscious mind and finding out why he is driven to destroy his life by slaughtering his own masculinity.

Bruce Jenner’s subconscious impulses, unhealed emotional traumas, and sexual confusion quite possibly were responsible for the car crash, and the death of the woman in Malibu.

Now, instead of Bruce having surgery to slaughter the image and likeness of the male form and slaughtering his masculinity, he might very well be charged with vehicular manslaughter.

True transformation cannot be done with knives and hormonal drugs, or with painted nails, or women’s clothing.

True transformation comes from within.

If Jenner decides to go ahead with these drugs and surgeries, he will no longer be human, but a monster.

When a person uses mind/body altering drugs and body deforming -self-mutilating- surgeries in a futile attempt to “change genders” they become sub-human.

If you are having sexual identity issues, please contact Dr. De Saint Simone, through me, by emailing me at

Dr. De Saint Simone helped me heal from illnesses and diseases doctors say have no cure. Dr. De Saint Simone completely changed the life of a former “lesbian”, named Grace, who found my Blog when she was struggling with severe problems because she thought she was “lesbian.”

Dr. De Saint-Simone can help anyone who wants to free themselves from gender dysfunction, illness, disease, or from most any kind of psychological problem.


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“Transgenderism” Should Not Be Celebrated, Promoted, Or Normalized

20/20’s interview with former Olympic athlete, Bruce Jenner, is probably going to be shown on national television very soon, so I thought it would be timely to re-publish an old article about Chaz Bono.

The minds, lives, and souls of children are being assaulted every day by media, magazines, the entertainment industry, and organizations with agendas to turn youth into gays or lesbians, or worse –to make them think that self-mutilation of their sex organs will bring them inner peace.

(re-published from 2011, with amendment below)

February 2015 –As suspected, Chaz Bono is indeed attempting to influence children with her sickness.

From her website (which I will not promote here with a link), with the heading, “Transforming Family.”

“A Los Angeles based family support group creating a positive environment for children, adolescents and their families to explore issues of gender identity.

Our mission is to empower children and families to create supportive and inclusive environments in which gender may be freely expressed and respected. Our vision is to create a society in which ALL children are respected and celebrated.”

Translation: “A Los Angeles based family support group creating a disturbed environment for children, adolescents and their families, in order to influence, encourage, and pollute their minds if they happen to express some kind of confusion, or “sexual identity” issues (which a child CANNOT HAVE)

‘Our mission is to empower the dark forces in the Universe, and to encourage children, adolescents, and other youth to take dangerous hormonal and deforming drugs, and to allow a surgeon to help them self-mutilate their sex organs –all with the help of psychologically ill people, who use the media, the entertainment industry, and people like Lena Dunham, feminism, and Lady Gaga to tell the child or teenager that they are perfectly normal and should be allowed to freely express their deviancy from nature –that is, without being criticized or condemned by anyone who is aware and awake enough to see the monsters being created.’

–In 2011, when the preview came on for the show “Dancing With the Stars.” I was pretty shocked to see Chaz Bono, the daughter of the star singing duo Sonny and Cher, being introduced as one of the contestants.

As most of you know, Chaz used to be “Chastity” Bono, the beautiful little blond girl who was often photographed with her famous parents.

Chastity has changed her name to “Chaz” and taken the identity of a man in the form of what is called “gender reassignment.”

Human beings cannot change their gender.

I wasn’t surprised when Dancing With the Stars announced Chaz as “he,” because Hollywood and much of society cater to lies, but I was taken back by the absolutely shocking difference between Chaz Bono and the other contestants. It was such a strange image. Even Chaz looked completely uncomfortable.

Chaz Bono, on the right, looks like a monster -a deformity- but society suffers from the "Emperor Has Clothes On" disease.

Chaz Bono, on the right, looks like a distorted human being

Chaz will never be a man. She is a female trapped by her own mind. Taking Testosterone does not make you into a man. Having a mastectomy does not make you into a man.

The only reason that I (originally) wrote this post is because I heard that Chaz is working with children. This is NOT OKAY. Chaz Bono is not a person at peace, and will never be at peace with herself unless she digs deeply into why she decided that she should be a man, and she needs to heal that problem.

Chaz’s disturbed idea of ‘gender identity issues’ is nothing more than a child, teenager, or adult having subconscious needs, or attachment difficulties –usually due to societal and parental influences –all of which can easily be corrected within THE MIND of the child, teen or adult with the aid of a professional who helps them penetrate their subconscious mind in order to find, and heal, the root cause of their ‘gender confusion.’ –heal it with the mind, not with hormonal drugs or a surgical knife.

The Making of “Chaz”

The End of Innocence is the name of Chastity (Chaz) Bono’s book, in which she describes her ‘transition’ from a female into a “male.”

The end of innocence alright.

The end began when her parents, the famous singing duo, “Sonny and Cher” left Chastity alone as a very young child, for long periods of time while they were touring –left her alone with a nanny named Linda.

Linda nurtured the abandoned, attention and love- starved Chastity

The nanny provided the “warmth and attention” Chastity so desperately needed as a child.

The female Linda, was the physical and emotional replacement for the child’s female AND MALE parental energies –absent from her life.

Linda gave Chastity, love and a feeling of safety, which Chastity admitted herself in her book that Sonny and Cher were unable to provide.

Linda then became a security blanket for Chastity when, at age four, her parents divorced.

Not long afterwards, Chastity began to “feel and dress like a boy,” and when Chastity was with her father after the divorce, Sonny treated her like a boy and called her “Fred” –which was most likely out of his desire to have had Chastity been born a boy, and not a girl. Sonny even encouraged his daughter to hang out with him like “father-and-son.”

‘Coincidentally,’ Linda ALSO used to call Chastity “Fred” when she cared for the girl as a small child, but Chastity did not remember this until, later in life, when her aunt told her this.

It is no wonder Chastity Bono became confused in her mind about her sexual identity. She was nurtured, and “cuddled,” by a female who was not her mother, and gained her father’s attention by being ‘a boy’ named “Fred”

In addition, Chastity writes in her memoir that, when she was eleven years old, she was sexually seduced by “Joan,” a lesbian friend of Cher’s who later became Chastity’s lesbian lover.

Chastity writes:

“My mom wasn’t always around, since she was working, so Joan sort of filled in that gap … I just focused on the fact that I wasn’t getting enough attention, and I often felt lonely or abandoned. When I spent time with Joan, I felt like the center of attention…”

Chastity wrote in her memoir, that when she became an adult, and told Cher that she had formed a lesbian relationship with Joan –the same lesbian nanny who had sexually molested Chastity when she was eleven– Cher’s response was, “this will be a good life experience for you.” 

After several years of thinking she was a boy, and a lesbian, Chastity was further psychologically influenced with a need to identify with a sense of herself -separate from her parents- and through years of bad relationships, drug addiction, depression, and having “therapy” with lesbian and transgendered therapists.

Thus, Chastity, became “Chaz.”

I find it incredibly sad that Chastity never explored the fact that her early childhood experiences were the direct link to her desire to have horrific self-mutilating surgeries, and to deform her female form by taking dangerous hormonal drugs.

All Chastity had to do was to heal her pain from the familial dysfunction, the sexual molestation by the nanny Joan, the confusion over being accepted by her father as a ‘boy,’ and to heal her sexual confusion in her body by being intimately touched by women as a child.

Instead, Chastity is now “Chaz” and trying to influence children, teens, and adults, to become a disfigured, mutilated person who will never be at peace within themselves.

Chaz is now just a distorted-looking woman, not a man, who has deep and very serious issues, that she is not facing in herself.

When she was on “Dancing With the Stars,” she told Rolling Stone magazine that “within a short while she will finally be able to afford to get herself a penis.”

Two years later, Chaz was quoted as saying that she is tired of questions about “transgendered people” having a penis or a vagina, but Chaz says she won’t talk about that because “it does nothing and it really is nobody’s business.”

If Ms. Bono does indeed have a “penis” after some kind of morbid surgical procedure, then she is more sick than I originally thought.

One might wonder where this penis comes from? A dead person? Another human being? Or are they all fully prosthetic?

"Chaz" Bono

“Chaz” Bono

There have been reports that Shiloh, the four-year-old daughter of Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie, likes to dress like a tomboy. Chaz Bono is quoted as saying, “I would love to talk to [Brad and Angelina] at some point, to at least let them know we have this resource for them if they ever need it.”

Leave Shiloh alone! Leave all children alone. Shiloh might very well just like to dress like a Tomboy. Many little girls do. It doesn’t mean they have a gender identity problem.

Chaz Bono needs to stay away from children.

Woman on the left looks healthy and radiates inner beauty. Woman on the right is psychologically disturbed and

Chastity Bono, on the left looks healthy and radiates inner beauty. Chaz on the right is obviously psychologically disturbed inside herself.

People who want to undergo a “transgender” procedure need deep psychoanalysis that penetrates the subconscious mind. They are confused inside and they need to get to the root of that confusion and change it in a healthy, pure, and natural way.

People do not need to mutilate their body or take hormonal drugs. This is creating monsters; not healthy, well-balanced joyful human beings.

Society looks upon people like Chaz Bono in the same way as the story of the naked emperor, walking through town where all the citizens proclaim “what wonderful clothes the emperor has on!”

The fact that many people in society accept Chaz Bono as normal, and call her a man, and uplift her as some kind of a hero or a “star” is dangerous for children.

If you are having sexual identity issues, please contact Dr. De Saint Simone, through me, by emailing me at

Dr. De Saint Simone completely changed the life of a former “lesbian”, named Grace, who found my Blog when she was struggling with severe problems because she thought she was “lesbian.”

Dr. De Saint Simone can help anyone who wants to free themselves from gender dysfunction.

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Diagnosing Children as “Transgender” is Child Abuse

This is a re-post. This case was, and still is, very disturbing.

It is no surprise that a boy, born among two others girls as triplets, would want to be more like a girl, or would gravitate to wanting to be part of the group, to blend in, to feel like he belongs with his triplet siblings. This is something very simple to correct in his mind, but it does not mean he wants to grow to have sex with boys, or to have a sex-change operation in the future!

This is a case of child abuse.

DENVER — “Colorado officials say a suburban Colorado Springs school district discriminated against a 6-year-old transgender girl by preventing her from using the girls’ bathroom, in what advocates described as the first such ruling in the next frontier in civil rights.

The family had been told that their first-grader, who was born a boy, could not use the girl’s bathroom and would have to use the restroom in the nurse’s office or the teachers’ lounge.

Coy Mathis’s family raised the issue after school officials at Eagleside Elementary in Fountain said the first-grader could use restrooms in either the teachers’ lounge or in the nurse’s office, but not the girls’ bathroom. Coy’s parents feared she would be stigmatized and bullied.

Coy Mathis

Coy Mathis

On Monday, the Mathis family and its lawyers celebrated the ruling on the steps of the state capitol. Coy, dressed in a glittering tank top, jeans and pink canvas sneakers, ran around a towering blue spruce tree as her mother spoke to reporters.

“Her future will be better if we get to this place where this is nothing to be ashamed of,” Kathryn Mathis said, noting the family hadn’t sought a civil rights battle but was happy for the Colorado Division of Civil Rights’ ruling.

As the gay rights movement has won mounting legal and electoral victories in recent years, advocates hope the latest decision will lend momentum to the struggles of transgendered people.”

This is not “gay rights,” This is CHILD SEXUAL ABUSE.

“Coy was born a triplet with two sisters and identified as a girl before she began attending elementary school”

At 5 months, she took a pink blanket meant for her sister Lily. Later, she showed little interest in toy cars and boy clothes with pictures of sports, monsters and dinosaurs on them. She refused to leave the house if she had to wear boy clothes. After her parents accepted her identity, they said, Coy come out of her shell.

Coy was diagnosed with “gender identity disorder” – a designation the American Psychiatric Association removed last year from its list of mental ailments. The removal reflected the growing medical consensus that identification as another gender cannot be changed.”

“Coy was labeled male at birth, but has always known that she is a girl, which she has expressed since she was 18 months old. Since kindergarten, Coy had worn girls’ clothing to school. Her classmates and teachers at Eagleside Elementary School used female pronouns to refer to her, and she used the girls’ bathrooms, just like any other girl in her school.  In mid-December 2012, the Fountain-Fort Carson School District 8 informed Coy’s parents that Coy would be prevented from using the girls’ bathrooms after winter break. The District ordered Coy to use the boys’ bathroom, a staff bathroom, or the nurse’s bathroom.”

A reader, Grace, writes:

“This article is deeply disturbing to me. This is just completely ridiculous, and is undoubtedly child abuse. I cannot believe how there is a willing and conscious attempt to completely mess up this child’s sense of self.
A four year old cannot be transgender, a four year old cannot be gay, a four year old cannot be confused about sexuality. It is so wrong that these people (the parents and “psychologist”) are doing this to this child.
I can say from my own experience that this child is being led down a path that he is not choosing, and I will not be surprised if he grows up to be suicidal, physically ill, or generally depressed/mentally at dis-ease. Although my experience is not as severe as his, in terms of setting a child up for “confusion,” I can relate nonetheless. My heart goes out to this innocent. He does not deserve to have the ridiculous neuroses of his parents to be forced on him and influence his life so dramatically!
One thing that bothers me more about this, is that the parents are probably being touted as “heros” by the ignorant masses who don’t know any better. These parents are “hip” and “cool” for being so progressive – allowing their child to express a female gender identity based on some (pardon my French) fucked up standard of what a baby who is “female” would do/say/touch. Now, all the hipster parents (like the ones showcased on “bad-ass mommies with tattoos” blogs) will flock to the idea of royally messing up their child to prove that in some way they are so liberal, so progressive, so “WITH IT.” Pardon my passion here, but I am just disgusted beyond politeness.
I really hope that someone investigates this further and throws the adults in charge in jail, or at least tries to open up their eyes…I just don’t know how else this poor child could be protected.
Apparently this all started because the boy picked up a pink blanket. Even in the most liberal of circles (who would want to defy gender norms and roles), this should mean nothing. Sure, get your son a pink blanket. Get your son a doll if he wants one. But then convince society that  these things are because he is actually FEMALE? That attitude does more harm than good, even to those who want to break down gender stereotypes…it’s just all so appalling to me.”

My notes: The parents and therapist need to be held accountable in this case. This is child sexual abuse because of the sexual nature of “transgender.”

Infants, and toddlers do not know who they truly are, nor any idea of sex. Nor does this boy have any idea of what has been done to him.

If you are having sexual identity issues, please contact Dr. De Saint Simone, through me, by emailing me at

Dr. De Saint Simone completely changed the life of a former “lesbian”, and saved her life from severe problems, because she thought she was “lesbian.”

Dr. De Saint Simone helped me heal from illnesses and diseases doctors say have no cure. She can help anyone who wants to free themselves from gender dysfunction, illness, disease, or from most any kind of psychological problem.

Posted in Child Abuse, child molestation, child sexual abuse, Health, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 22 Comments

The Feminist Degeneration of Valentine’s Day

Many years ago, a friend of mine asked if I wanted to attend a theatrical play called, The Vagina Monologues.

At the time, I was still completely repressing my mother’s sexual abuse of me.

The sexual abuse was beginning to surface, but only in subtle ways. Yet, I cringed at the title of the play, and politely said “no thank you.”

At the time, this friend was fully aware that my father sexually abused me so she pressed a little, “but it’s about sexual abuse” she told me.

I still declined, because the title alone was unappealing, and even offensive to me, not only as someone who was repressing sexual abuse by a woman, but offensive to me as a human being.

I am so grateful that I trusted my instincts, because if I had attended the play, I would have experienced some seriously debilitating physical and psychological turmoil, during the play, and for a number of weeks afterwards.

vaginamonologuesThe Vagina Monologues is part of an ongoing program to legalize pedophilia:

“All they need to do is produce a young person whose “narrative” is that he or she rather enjoys being the sexual plaything of someone four or five times his or her age, and that’s the end of it. That’s the “narrative,” and you can’t trample on anybody’s narrative.” ~J.R. Dunn, American Thinker

What narrative is Dunn referring to? Grace Dunham’s public statement that what her sister, Lena Dunham, did to her for ten years was not harmful to Grace.

The very sad paradox in Grace’s proclamation is that she is openly a lesbian, and may very well be gay because of Lena’s sexual aggression, abuse, and psychological manipulation of Grace –who is seven years younger than Lena.

Grace, and her sister Lena, have even joked about “making Grace gay.”

Uncomfortable truths are often covered up with humor.

Dunn is also referring to the normalization –in fact, propelling– of female-female child sexual abuse.

The Vagina Monologues was created by Eve Ensler, a bi-sexual woman, who placed a scene in the play called, “The Little Coochie Snorcher That Could.”

In the skit, a 24-year-old woman seduces a 13-year-old girl with alcohol, and then sexually molests her. By moral and criminal law, this constitutes rape.

However, in the play, the little girl declares:

“Now people say it was a kind of rape … Well, I say if it was rape, it was a good rape…”

After concerned individuals complained, the reference to “good rape” was stopped in some performances of the play, but the so-called ‘positive’ experience of a young girl being seduced and sexually abused by a grown woman, remains the theme.

In the play, the little girl raves about her orgasm (an orgasm brought on, during an act of child sexual abuse). The child proclaims in the play, “she gently and slowly lays me out on the bed”… “I’ll never need to rely on a man.”

In the updated versions of the play (also due to complaints by the public), the 13 year-old girl was changed to a 16 year-old. However, even a sixteen year-old girl does not have the discrimination to make rational decisions when seduced and manipulated by an older woman who, by age alone, is an authority figure to the girl, and usually someone the victim trusts or looks up to.

The suggestion that female-female sexual abuse is “good” for the child, and not sexual abuse at all, is made quite clear in this play.

The Vagina Monologues encourages the disturbing belief that if a woman sexually molests a female child, it’s okay, and even good for the little girl.

The play is presented nationwide, every year on Valentine’s Day, a day which symbolizes Love, devotion, self-sacrifice, courtship, and romance. The Vagina Monologues have devalued what true Love is, by advertising the play as “V” Day, as in “vagina.”

The play consists of numerous monologues read by many different actresses, with each of the monologues addressing varying aspects of female experiences, like sex, love, rape, menstruation, female genital mutilation, masturbation, birth, and orgasm.

The recurring theme of the play is that the vagina is a tool of female empowerment, and ‘the ultimate embodiment of individuality’ and the play goes into tampons and tools used in OBGYN exams, and even considers the word “cunt” to be positive.

Supporters of the play praise its fund-raising abilities, and that it will help “end violence against women.”

Apparently, the creator of the play, those who act in it, and its supporters, have no intellectual understanding of the fact that it is not just men who inflict violence on women, and that female-female child sexual abuse, has a strong propensity to cause serious, life-altering and debilitating psychological and physical problems in the victim –including sexual identity and sexual dysfunction issues.

Lean Dunham’s book, Not That Kind of Girl, and her open revelations –as if she is proud of herself—of having forced her five year-old sister (Lena was 12 at the time) to “make-out” with her, and Lena’s portrayal of sexual molestation as being funny, and the brazen photos of the sexualization of a child that she put on the Internet … has further created the idea that Child-on-Child sexual abuse, perpetrated between a female abuser and a female child, causes no harm, and should in fact be celebrated –and maybe even practiced among sisters.

The Vagina Monologues projects the same message –that it’s good for a stranger female to perpetrate sexual abuse on a young teenage girl –and not only “good” but a superior way for a young child to be brought to orgasm.

I am certain that Kristen Cunnane would have a lot to say about The Vagina Monologues.

Kristen Cunnane was psychologically tormented and sexually abused by her favorite teacher, Julie Correa, who taught physical education and coached the girl’s sports teams at Kristen’s upscale suburban school in the mid 1990’s.

Julie Correa was a young married woman in her mid-20s. Kristen was a 14 year-old girl, who trusted Correa, and looked up to her.

Julie molested the teenage girl, over a course of months, and would go so far as to sneak into Kristen’s home when Kristen was out with her mother.

Julie would hide in Kristen’s bedroom closet, and then molest the teen girl when she arrived home and walked into her bedroom.

For Julie Correa to hide in Kristen’s closet is highly disturbing, and it demonstrates that women can be more psychologically deviant than men in their sexual violation of a child.

The Vagina Monologues, is alarming on multiple levels.

The play not only promotes child molestation when both the abuser and child are female, but it pushes the idea that women don’t even need men –that they should become lesbians.

The play also annihilates the beautiful concept of Valentine’s Day, and degenerates it into a day for the celebration of lesbians, child abuse, vaginas, and feminism.

The play normalizes child sexual molestation perpetrated by a woman, and undoubtedly, drives the idea that adult/child sex should be made legal.

There is evidence of a female version of NAMBLA (The pro-pedophilia “North American Man-Boy Love Association”), called NAWGLA, who might also be going under the name “butterfly kisses.”

In addition, and not surprising, is that RAINN (Rape Abuse & Incest National Network) not only publicly encourages Lena Dunham, they also promote The Vagina Monologues.

The word “feminist” derives from the root meaning, “feminine,” which means “of the female sex,” “she who suckles,” or “having qualities considered appropriate to a woman.”

The advocacy of women’s rights, which is what “feminism” was founded on –the grounds of political, social, and economic equality to men– has been completely thwarted into a grotesque, reptilian-like group of individuals who, in no way, resemble the feminine persona, what a woman stands for, or what her role is on earth.

Women, by nature, are supposed to be the protectors of children, not the abusers of them.

Throughout time, females have been counted on to retain compassion, dignity, and the right for life to exist. It is women who have been given the sole right to nurse a child, and who have been looked to for comforting victims, and are the only gender to be able to give birth to a child.

Feminism, is not about empowering women. Feminism -as it stands- has nothing to do with women’s rights, equal pay, or political, social and economic equality to men.

There is nothing empowering about ‘talking vaginas,’ the degradation of women, the physical and emotional power of sexually abusing a child, the normalization of same-sex sexual acts, or the purposeful degradation of men.

It is not empowering for a woman to discuss her vagina, or sit naked on a toilet for a camera. It is not empowering for women to be vulgar and downgrade men.

Empowerment of women begins when women stop defending one another, and instead, defend truth and justice. The empowerment of women begins when women stop believing they are the superior sex (both sexes have good qualities), that they don’t need men, and when they honor the true feminine qualities of grace, compassion, softness, inner beauty, and respect and dignity for all life, and for men.

Powerful women look to the good attributes of men, and admire them, by uplifting men with honor and respect for their goodness, masculinity, and as the defenders of women and children that manhood is supposed to be.

How can women expect a man to be a protector and a guardian of women, if women continue to demoralize men, and make them feel obsolete?

Powerful women do not use, or speak of their bodies in a crass and vulgar manner. They use their bodies as a way to be gentle and powerful simultaneously.

Women were once considered Sacred in this world, but feminism has all but abolished the sanctity of women.

Ultimately, Valentine’s Day, is linked to Saint Valentine.

Saints represent sanctity, holiness, self-sacrifice, and consecration to a place of honor and reverence.

This is what women should strive for –not to be more powerful than men, or to outdo them, or to replace them –but to raise their consciousness to a place where men desire to revere women again.

If women want to end violence against women, then they need to begin by looking at themselves, and their role in how men see them.

It’s no wonder why so many men are full of anger and resentment, and feelings of inadequacy. A lot of women -especially feminists- treat men like crap by degrading them, and by minimizing their important role in life.

Love has respect for both genders, and Love honors the innate qualities in each sex.

Download-Happy-Valentines-Day-Everyone-ImagesMay the innocence and intrinsic love in children, remind you of Valentine’s day.



There is a movement to have the play performed on every college and university campus in North America. If I were in college, I would have a protest sign made, and would gather as many people as possible, to stand with me outside the theater.

Posted in Child Abuse, child molestation, child sexual abuse, Headlines, Health, News, repressed memory | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 7 Comments

Mother-Child Incest: An Abomination of Nature

A portion of this article was originally posted in 2009, but It’s time has come to be re-posted, with additional text.

When I first saw Gregg Milligan on Oprah many years ago, I was still so unhealed with regards to my mother’s sexual abuse of me. I was crying and so angry that day –crying over women getting away with sex crimes, merely because they are women.

Gregg Milligan has always been on my mind, and in my heart. I have never forgotten his strength, courage, and willingness to go beyond himself to help other victims of mothers who sexually abuse their children, and to help stop the denial that permeates society about this very real -and more common than we think- crime against nature.

Gregg Milligan’s mother began to fondle him when he was just four years-old

She began to aggressively sexually assault, and beat him, soon after.

Gregg was sometimes beaten unconscious. Gregg’s father left when Gregg was two, and by the age of eight, Gregg was being sexually abused by the men his prostitute mother brought home to have sex with.

Gregg’s mother sexually violated him in ways that would be called, “unspeakable”…but it must be spoken.

Can we imagine the terrible guilt inside of Gregg being brutally beaten by his mother, when she could not reach an orgasm while sexually abusing him?

Gregg says about this heinous act:

“Through her difficulty reaching climax, she would become frustrated and violent, hitting and punching and slapping not only my genitals, but my face and body.”

What this woman did to her son is beyond the repair of superficial therapy and “positive-thinking” therapy. For a mother to cause violence on the genitals and body of her son because she was so deviant in nature, that she not only had to abuse a child for sexual stimulation, but that she could not orgasm, is a traumatic crime –one that probably affected Gregg in ways that we cannot imagine.

Gregg says:

“Around 10 years old, I started to get this unbelievable feeling of dread that if I don’t get out I am going to die from the decadence, the debauchery, the forced molestations and the beatings that became more severe.”

Gregg escaped at age eleven, his mother is now deceased.

Gregg says that he suffered from panic attacks and he wet the bed until he was sixteen years-old. He had hysterical paralysis for months.

Gregg saw many different child psychologists and therapists. Gregg also endured several foster homes and sheltered himself at the homes of friends.

Although he was able to finally go to college and attend graduate school, Gregg endured years of sleep disturbances, chronic nightmares, and anxiety attacks.

Gregg also experienced sexual dysfunction. Gregg had problems with intimacy, and his first marriage ended in divorce.

Men who have been sexually abused by their mother will often suffer from sexual problems. Some men become hyper-sexual, or addicted to pornography. In Gregg’s case, he has to deal with the fact that he was also sexually abused by adult males. This can create severe sexual problems, confusing sexual thoughts, as well as sexual identity issues in a person.

Experts agree that sexual abuse by mothers is “really hard to diagnose — most of the time it’s not witnessed.” 

In addition, mothers can excuse, explain away, or more easily cover up the sexual abuse they are perpetrating, because they have a natural role to be with naked children, or to be bathing them, or performing enemas, or to be caught touching a child’s sexual organ.

Most children have normal physical examinations and any abrasions or redness from the abuse will disappear within 24 hours of the assault.

However, the number one reason mothers get away with sexual abuse, is society’s denial system that ‘women do such things,’ or ‘mothers don’t do that to their children!’ Or people think, ‘well, if she was sexually molesting her child, it’s not as bad as when a man does it.’

One of the unspeakable secrets in the world of child sexual abuse is that mothers can be molesters. Often, they prey on daughters, but more frequently their sons — who report increased feelings of isolation and sexual confusion along with thoughts of suicide.

I am well aware that my on-going articles about Lena Dunham have annoyed some of my readers. It appears that many women, who have been sexually abused by men or teenage boys, do not understand the darkness –the depths of the emotional pain and disturbing, disgusting feelings when a woman is sexually abused by their mother, or an older sister.

There seems to be a number of women who defend women, no matter what they have done, merely because they are women.

For people like myself, this is a re-wounding.

People don’t understand that Lena Dunham pried open deep-seated wounds in me, and every single one of her fans, admirers, and apologists also re-wounded me.

Personally, I feel Lena Dunham might have been sexually abused by her mother, but because she is so far gone into her own ego, and because she has so many supporters, and friends, and the press –who will never be truthful with her –who will never speak up to Lena about how wrong she was to write what she did in her book, and because her parents raised Lena to believe pornography and child molestation stories are “art,” Lena will most likely never do any inner reflection.

She is also so deeply embedded into the debauchery/porno scene, that she probably doesn’t care about ever looking into the fact that she might have been sexually abused in her childhood and should deal with it.

Maybe Lena Dunham will never know that child sexual and psychological abuse, is harmful and can be debilitating for the victim? I can’t see her ever knowing it when people tell her she is perfectly normal, and when she has joked about “making her sister gay.”

Why do I feel Lena Dunham might have been sexually abused by her mother?

Lena was recently quoted in an interview as saying she has suffered from obsessive compulsive disorder since she was nine. (She even joked about OCD, which is a very serious, life-altering mental disorder).

OCD has been linked to child sexual abuse, and incest. I used to have OCD.

The 26-year-old Dunham said she took antidepressants in high school, and was obsessed with the number eight.

“I remember saying to my mom when I was little, ‘I just had to imagine having sex with you eight times,'”… “and [Lena’s mother] really took it in stride! She was like, ‘Well, it’s your imagination; it didn’t really happen.'” ~Lena Dunham 1.

Hmmm. No one except Lena Dunham can get away with joking about having sex with her own mother.

Most of her fans will laugh it off. Her friends and the press will say, ‘oh, there goes Lena again, saying silly things. haha.”

However, anyone with common sense, and two degrees of intelligence would say to themselves, “whoa, that was a bizarre comment for a female child to make about her mother.”

Lena Dunham’s father, Carroll Dunham, is a painter of pornography, whose paintings you can look up online by Googling, “Carroll Dunham, paintings.” But beware… they are highly disturbing to anyone who was sexually abused by a woman.

It has also been well-reported that Lena Dunham’s mother was a photographer, who filled the family home with nude pictures of herself, “legs spread defiantly.”

My whole point about Lena Dunham, is that none of what she has written about, or done towards her sister, is normal. Very little of what has been reported about her upbringing is normal, and much of it is indicative of incest possibly having taken place in that home –incest other than what Lena describes doing to her little sister for ten years.

Those who have disagreed and argued with me about Lena Dunham, need to understand that I don’t care if she is a woman, or that most of what Lena did to her little sister was ‘passive abuse.’

I do care if she perpetuates sexual abuse, laughs at child molestation, or if she is made out to be a role model, or the “voice of our generation.”

The children of this earth need to be safeguarded by the Lena Dunhams of this world. I don’t care what happened to her as a child, as long as she continues to deny the pain she has caused, and the normalization of sibling incest, and as long as she thinks there is nothing wrong with it. Because once a teenager sexually abuses a younger child, they have crossed a line. They have become perpetrator, and are no longer a victim….they have crossed over to victimizer, and a hypocrite as well.

If people are going to excuse women for sexual deviation towards children, or for outright sexually abusing a child merely because the woman was once a victim herself as a child, then people must also be willing to excuse every man who has ever harmed a child sexually –because most men were also victims of child sexual abuse before they became a perpetrator.

In addition, Lena Dunham devalues women, devalues rape, and has no self-respect or self-dignity. She peddles debauchery, and is a liar. Thus, Lena Dunham should not be pushed as a role model for women.

I also care deeply that victims and survivors of sexual abuse perpetrated by their mothers, and sisters, be believed and not minimized or brushed off.

People like Gregg Milligan, and myself, are usually not believed by anyone in the family, by neighbors, or by society in general. This is why the vast majority of people who are sexually abused by their mother (or an adult of the same-sex) will never speak of it.

It is extremely difficult for me, as a woman, to expose what my mother did to me because it is a double unnatural thing. Mother, and female-female.

I have yet to write about, or tell anyone, except my therapist the level of sexual deviancy my mother perpetrated on me as a child. It is disturbing, vile, and one of the most embarrassing things a person can ever allow to come out of their mouth to another human being.

One day, maybe soon, I will speak those secrets.

In the interim, it is so refreshing for me to know that Gregg Milligan is out there, doing the work, because I feel so alone with regards to child abuse issues, but specifically mothers who sexually abuse their children. Even some incest survivors have sort of condemned me in a sense for daring to talk about a woman like that. Gregg has experienced the same kind of denial and reaction in his work.

Women are so protected by society, and by other women.

It is harmful to hold the opinion that all mothers love their children, and would never harm them.

Gregg Milligan said to me, “passive abuse is just as brutal and damaging to the child.” He is 100% correct, and not only can female-female sexual abuse sometimes be passive-aggressive, or subtle…but when the mother, or anyone, witnesses sexual abuse and looks the other way, this is also passive abuse.

I am SO grateful for Gregg Milligan’s courage, strength, and his willingness to keep speaking up, in spite of the ignorance, name-calling, and condemnation by those who do not understand the depths of the psychological, and emotional destruction that a mother, woman, or older teenage girl can have on their victim.

I want to thank Gregg for being brave enough to tell his story, and to do the work. Many men and women are very grateful for his strength and courage.

To buy Gregg’s book, A Beautiful World, and to visit his website, click here


1. Lena Dunham and 9 More Stars with OCD,, By Luchina Fisher and Alexis Shaw

Posted in Child Abuse, child molestation, child sexual abuse, Crime, false memory syndrome, Headlines, Health, News | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 10 Comments

RAINN: Continuing Their Support Of Admitted Child Molester

Yesterday I received an email response from Rape Abuse & Incest National Network (RAINN).

My letters to them can be read by clicking here and here.

As suspected, RAINN’s response did not include any kind of apology for openly supporting Lena Dunham, an admitted child molester, or for publicly encouraging a woman who falsely accused a man of rape –even to the point of her book publisher altering their books in order to avoid a lawsuit by the man Lena Dunham had consensual sex with.

Dunham SixAs I anticipated, RAINN did not acknowledge their grave error in publicly supporting a woman who described, in disgusting detail, how she molested her sister -seven years her junior, when the child was ages one through ten.

Nor did RAINN apologize for praising a woman who joked about committing acts of a “child sex predator,” and who told Rolling Stone Magazine that she used to force her -then five year old- sister to “make-out” with her, and a woman who posted highly distributing photos of the five year-old on the Internet.

Instead, RAINN’s response to me included an apology for their delay in responding, and a dry, generic reference to being “sorry” for “what I experienced as a child,” as well as a statement about RAINN’s future plans to revamp to “better serve” incest and rape survivors.

After my two letters to RAINN, each over two pages long, and each letter providing detailed accounts of what Lena Dunham has done and said, and after including the disturbing photos Ms. Dunham posted online of her little sister…. RAINN’s one-sentence response to me about Lena Dunham was this:

“To address the concern in your letter, we have not worked with Lena Dunham [in] the past — she is not affiliated with the organization. “

This statement does not answer my concern that RAINN’s support of Lena Dunham was due to the possibility of financial donations presented to RAINN from Ms. Dunham.

In addition, RAINN’s reply about Lena Dunham, completely ignores every concern I had in my letters to RAINN. It totally disregards every one of the vital issues, clearly addressed in my letters.

Lena_Dunham NineIt remains uncertain if RAINN receives financial donations from Ms. Dunham, but this virtual brush off, does not, and will never excuse, their organization’s public praising of a female child sexual molester.

RAINN’s response minimizes Child-On-Child sexual abuse, and devalues victims of sibling incest.

RAINN has no idea what kind of pain and anger, and re-traumatizing has occurred in countless victims of child sexual abuse by Dunham’s book.

RAINN’s support of Ms. Dunham’s book, “Not That Kind of Girl” is supporting a book which normalizes sibling incest, laughs at child molestation, and puts children at risk.

Does RAINN refuse to see its error, and refuse to acknowledge their mistake because Lena Dunham is a woman?

Let me be clear RAINN, I would rather be raped by a man, than sexually abused by a female…and BOTH happened to me as a child.

Sexual abuse, perpetrated by a female, can have serious, life-altering effects on the victim, especially a female victim –effects that are often more serious than when a man sexually abuses a child.

I am completely blown away that an organization which considers itself a refuge for rape and incest survivors, would aggrandize a woman who scoffs at victims of child sexual abuse, and who feels child molestation is normal and acceptable behavior.

Dunham Seven If RAINN does not retract their public approval of Ms. Dunham, they in fact continue to support her and thus, Ms. Dunham’s sexual deviation towards children.

In case RAINN has forgotten what their public support of Ms. Dunham and her book looks like, here it is:

Any removal of these posts on RAINN’s Facebook Page, or their Twitter account, will not be sufficient, and will merely symbolize the covering up of their support of her -not the retraction of it.

The only action which can undo the damage done by RAINN, is for a member of the organization to issue a public retraction of their original support of Ms. Dunham and her book, Not That Kind of Girl.

“Survivors everywhere are grateful [to Lena Dunham]” ~RAINN

No, survivors everywhere are NOT grateful. Untold numbers of us are angry, disturbed, re-triggered, and flabbergasted by a child molester being uplifted as a role model.

The reason I have posted this response on my Blog is because I want RAINN to be aware that their lack of good judgement will affect them. This post, and my letters to RAINN, will not be removed from this Blog, until RAINN issues a public retraction of their support, and glorification, of Lena Dunham.

I have zero faith in RAINN as an organization which purports to care about rape and incest survivors, or which knows how to handle cases of incest –especially Child-On-Child incest, perpetrated by an older female sibling.

Dunham DisturbingA copy of this response will be mailed via the United States Postal Service to RAINN, and to anyone else I feel should know about RAINN’s approval of a child molester.

Posted in Child Abuse, child molestation, child sexual abuse, false memory syndrome, Headlines, News | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment