Watch Out Parents: Sexual Identity Indoctrination Coming To a School School Near You

Ontario Teacher Suspended for Criticizing Child Procurement Program

by Henry Makow Ph.D.

March 29, 2015

“Introducing pre-puberty children to sex is psychological sexual abuse, leading to
physical abuse. Parents must take vigorous legal action. Teachers must refuse to groom children for pedophiles. The time has come for civil disobedience.

We’ve heard about bakeries who refused to bake cakes for gay weddings as a matter of principle. Now we have 75,000 elementary school teachers in Ontario who are forced to act as satanist social engineers and procurers. Their livelihood is at stake.  Like Eichmann, will they “obey orders”?

If you were a pedophile, wouldn’t you want children to learn the following? (see article)

An Ontario teacher has been suspended after criticizing Ontario’s sex ed in social media. She wishes to remain anonymous as she “fears for her safety.”

She writes:

“Thank you for covering the sex-ed topic in such an informative, educational, way. As a public school elementary teacher, I had been trying to do the same by using social media (Twitter, Facebook.) At least until I have been gagged by my own Union and sent to the school board’s “Tweet Right” course.

gingerbreadmanWhat is happening in schools and particularly the union is terrifying. We are being gradually conditioned to approach children with sex talk via images of gingerbread cookies. Most of us have learned as children to reject candy from strangers. Yet here we are, teachers from the Elementary Teachers Federation of Ontario about to start using images of candied cookies to have adult chats about sex with children.

It’s simply criminal. There ought to be some sort of political/judicial/criminal action to stop this dead in it’s tracks.

There is this sort of linguistic/psychological approach gradually implementing the “sex-ed” curriculum. There is an occult quality to the entire thing and disturbing overtones of pedophilia.

I hope you continue your work on this subject. Parents and teachers need to be educated about the sex education program and its genesis. They simply don’t know. They need to be informed with the facts about it so they can understand.”


The sex ed curriculum was designed by a pedophile. Benjamin Levin pleaded guilty to making written child pornography, counseling a person to commit a sexual assault, and possession of child pornography. He also told an undercover police officer he had sex with his own daughters and hoped to have sex with his granddaughters.

The Ontario Sex Ed Curriculum is designed to groom children for pedophiles, homosexual and otherwise. If you were a pedophile, wouldn’t you want children to learn:

Graphic lessons on sexual body parts including “penis”, “testicles”, “vagina” and “vulva.” (age 6)
How to give consent. (age 6 and older)
How gender is a social construct unrelated to anatomy. (Age 8)
That homosexuality is cool. Gay families are normal. (Age 8)
That they should start dating. (Age 9)
That masturbation is good. (Age 12)
That vaginal lubrication is useful. (Age 12)
That anal intercourse and fellatio are good ways to avoid pregnancy and stds. (age 13) 
That doesn’t mention anal sex is 3000% more likely to result in AIDS; that almost 1 out of every 3 actively gay men in Toronto will get AIDS; but says it’s OK to keep having sex even if you have AIDS.

That sex is a purely recreational activity whose purpose is pleasure, apart from love or marriage. According to the Coalition for Life, “the words ‘love’ and ‘marriage’ never appear once in the sex-education strand of the curriculum. Not a single mention. Does that reveal the mindset of its writers, if not the philosophical underpinnings of the curriculum itself?”


If you didn’t believe in a satanist global conspiracy empowered by the Illuminati banking cartel, you should now. The people supporting the Ontario Sex Ed program are globalist proxies like the Communist party, Planned Parenthood, OPHEA (The Ontario Physical & Health Education Association) and “Queer Ontario” which according to their website, promotes bondage, casual sex, sadism/masochism and group sex.

The sex ed agenda is international in scope. A Greek wrote to Ann Diamond recently: “Yesterday I went to a conversation that took place in a primary school and was organized by school teachers and social workers. They invited parents to tell them that it is necessary to put sex ed in kindergarten. I asked them where they take their instructions from, they said from WHO [World Health Organization]. I talked and I opposed to all of this, and yes, they were impressed from the things I knew, and they didn’t have an answer. It’s spreading wild, guys. It’s a world agenda.”

What passes as spontaneous “social change” is in fact an organized process of satanic possession.

So far only one man has launched a legal action. A Mr. Tourlakis has sued the Hamilton-Wentworth District School Board (HWDSB) for refusing to give him advance notification of lessons that contradict his religious beliefs. They have also refused to let him to withdraw his children from class.  (Point 12)

But all parents and teachers need to challenge this in court. Forcing teachers to sexualize children contravenes the Canadian Charter of Rights and Freedoms which guarantees “freedom of conscience and religion.” (2a)

Muzzling teachers contravenes the guarantee of “freedom of thought, belief, opinion and expression, including freedom of the press and other media of communication.”

Furthermore, the Charter protects Catholic schools who refuse to participate. (29)

I have to ask Ontario parents. Do you love your children? Prove it.”


- See more at:


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Sexual Predators Can Confuse the Sexual Identity of a Child, and Even Get Them To Commit Murder

This is a re-post from 2012. It is timely…

“People need to realize that there are many, many of us out there, and we’re not going away.”
~ an admitted pedophile

When a child is being sexually violated, they often go through the process of anticipating the abuse, experiencing the abuse, and then an act of affection or calming behavior by the abuser. This is when van der Kolk says, the “fantasy of fusion and symbiosis” begins. 1 Some people even theorize that victims of abuse can literally become addicted to their abuser as well as to the abuse –just like a drug addiction.

This kind of morbid emotional union might even lead to murder.

In 2002, Alex and Derek King (above) were tried as adults and convicted of second degree murder for killing their father. The two boys, only twelve and thirteen at the time –and too young to truly understand the seriousness of their actions– had originally confessed to the murder.

The boys later said they had lied in order to cover for Rick Chavez, a “family friend,” and the man who Alex says had been sexually abusing him. The boys claimed Chavez killed their father to keep him from knowing about the abuse and because he would not have allowed them to live with Chavez. 2

Much of the country was riveted when watching baby-faced Alex take the stand in his dress shirt and little tie. Alex told the court, and the world, about a sexual relationship with forty year-old Chavez.

I was one of millions who sat glued to Court TV to watch the trial. It was heartbreaking to see a small boy tell of his romantic love for an adult man.


Rick Chavez (in the photo with the boys) was eventually found not guilty of the murder. 3 The verdict shocked many people. 4 In spite of the love-letters written from Alex to his molester, Chavez was also found not-guilty of child molestation. Once again, it appears that a jury with an apple pie minded denial system, had refused to believe that a grown a man was having sex with a little boy.

The verdict defied the testimony given by Alex, and it flew in the face of common sense. Although unknown by the jury at the time, Chavez had been previously convicted of sexually assaulting two 13 year-old boys in 1984.

However, Chavez was convicted of false imprisonment in the King case, and later, he was convicted of accessory to the murder. Chavez is serving 35 years.

When Alex King testified at the murder trial, he spoke of his feelings for Chavez as if they were young lovers. Chavez not only stole Alex’s childhood, but he caused terrible sexual confusion in Alex, who wrote in a love letter to Chavez that he did not know if he was straight or gay.

This turmoil can be devastating for a child.

Alex King’s love letters to Chavez were painful and tragic. Alex’s crooked little handwriting resembled a young girl’s diary entry after she meets her first love. Alex wrote to Chavez, “I love you always and forever.”

Alex wrote that his life was uncertain before he met Rick Chavez and that he didn’t know if he wanted to be a teacher, a governor, or the president of the United States. Alex wrote that he thought these goals were what life was about. He said that once he met Rick Chavez, he realized he was wrong and that life was about sharing with someone else.

Little Alex thought he was in love with Chavez and wrote (maybe even prophetically) that his ultimate goal was to do whatever Chavez wanted. 5

Although Alex says it was his idea to kill his father, and Derek says he was the one who ultimately murdered their father, Chavez encouraged, coerced, and even pushed those boys to kill their father.

Whether or not the King boys committed or planned the murder, they should not be blamed for the crime. The King boys come from a society in which children are taught that violence is the only way to solve a problem, and to kill whatever is in their way.

If the King boys did kill their father, they also did it because of a lack of love and lack of healthy parental nourishment. Their mother was a stripper, who left the entire family when they were very young. There was mental and physical abuse by the father, and because of “discipline problems,” he sent Derek off to live with a foster family, and Alex was shoveled off to stay with Rick Chavez.

Alex and Derek’s father never did a background check on Chavez, and I am sure the boys both felt subconscious rage at their father for not protecting them from a molester.

Both boys were pawned off by their father, and abandoned by their mother.

Derek openly admitted to having overwhelming anger for his father. Alex still struggles with why the murder happened, and you can see the pain in his eyes. I am certain there is hidden rage at his father for placing him in the hands of a child rapist.

Alex had his entire life ahead of him, but it was ripped apart by Chavez’s degeneracy.

Child abusers have the ability to get their victim to do almost anything for them. The relationship between the sexual predator and his prey is extremely complicated. Through a form of brain washing, the abuser can twist the victim’s mind by grooming the child into believing that the abuser is the child’s only path to self-worth, and to love.

Child abusers are deceptive, manipulative, and self-oriented. Alex and Derek were being manipulated by a convicted child sexual abuser, and their sense of self was gone.

Pedophiles and child abusers steal children’s goals, possible future contributions to society, their freedom –and often, their sexuality. The victim grows with all the scars, and eventually the rage sets in.

Thousands of people were enraged when the King boys were convicted of murder. The trial was shown in its entirety on Court TVand I was among many people, who wrote the judge in the case, hoping to convince him to reverse the conviction.

On Thursday October 17 2002, the Miami judge overturned the convictions of Alex and Derek King.

The judge ordered that the attorneys both reach a plea bargain, or a new trial would be granted for the boys. Alex was given seven years, and Derek, eight years.

This shows that, when people respond to injustice in great numbers, things can be changed. Abuse survivors know better than anyone that silence is approval. Writing letters in situations like this can create positive changes for victims of child molestation and child rape, and can modify the court system. For once, America was not silent, and these two boys now have their freedom as handsome young men.

Some cases wrench my heart. But this one has a happy ending.


Although I can still see pain in Alex’s eyes, and in his tone, both boys are enrolled in college, have lots of friends and girlfriends, and both the young men have people who stepped up, in order to become the loving families the boys never had growing up.


1. The Compulsion to Repeat the Trauma Re-enactment, Revictimization, and Masochism, Bessel A. van der Kolk, MD Psychiatric Clinics of North America, Volume 12, Number 2, Pages 389-411,
June 1989
2. Associated Press, Bill Kaczor-NY, 09-06-02 1743EDT
3. Sons found guilty, pedophile acquitted, Rochelle Steinhaus, Sept 6 2002, Court TV Website
4.  King Brother’s Relatives Angry at Man’s Acquittal, Fox News, Feb. 13 2003,  Free,
5. Notes from Alex King ,Court TV, Aug 29, 2002
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Are You Experiencing Intrusive Memories?

Physical and Psychological Symptoms Can Substantiate Memories of Trauma and Child Sexual Abuse

Post Traumatic Stress Disorder symptoms can vary in intensity, and can come and go depending upon your level of stress, joy, whom you are with, or where you are.

You may have more PTSD symptoms when you’re stressed about small or large things happening in your life.

You may feel the PTSD symptoms when you experience reminders of any past trauma or repressed trauma.

Some examples are a car backfiring, someone slamming a door, the sound of footsteps, dishes being rattled in the kitchen, someone knocking on a door, or any sudden or unexpected sound.

Anything on a television program can trigger a post traumatic response, and sometimes, a voice on a television show –especially if you are not watching the show and only listening to it– can trigger a repressed memory. You may not be certain what the memory means, or have a full memory of anything, but the trigger is often a piece of a puzzle.

Symptoms of intrusive memories may include:

  • Recurrent, unwanted distressing memories of a traumatic event (and the event might not make any sense to you)
  • Reliving the traumatic event as if it were happening again (flashbacks)
  • Upsetting dreams about the traumatic event
  • Severe emotional distress or physical reactions to something that reminds you of the event
  • Avoidance (which is avoiding certain people, places, events, or activities that could remind you of a traumatic or emotionally painful event).

Other PTSD symptoms can include:

    • Irritability, angry outbursts or aggressive behavior
    • Always being on guard for danger (hyper-vigilance)
    • Overwhelming guilt or shame
    • Self-destructive behavior, like drug or alcohol addiction, or sexual promiscuity
    • Trouble concentrating
    • Trouble sleeping
    • Being easily startled or frightened


People who have been sexually abused, psychologically traumatized, and physically traumatized as children can also experience a variety of other symptoms. These include somatic disturbances, visual images, auditory memories, and memories that are experienced in the form of taste, touch, and smell.

“Body memories” are somatic reactions to unhealed sexual abuse and trauma, and have been reported in Holocaust survivors who have not gotten past their depression and anxiety. The relentless somatic disorders in the war survivors have been linked to their trauma in the camps.

Body memories are a common reaction to trauma

Most people who have been sexually abused (whether or not they have always remembered it) have physical problems which stem from the abuse. The brain is attached to the body. Body memories are simply the brain sending signals to other parts of the body in the moment when the person is reminded of the trauma or sexual abuse. The trigger is usually subconscious, so often, the person has no idea what has triggered their reaction.

The body holds the emotional pain when the mind cannot yet handle it –due to denial, or perhaps an inability to yet comprehend something horrific that has happened to them at the hands of family members, loved ones, or a parent.

A study on eighty-six women found that those with unclear memories of abuse suffered symptoms close to, or as severe, as those who had always known they were sexually abused. Those with unclear memories ranked higher in the number of symptoms than those who had suffered physical abuse in childhood, but not sexual abuse.

The symptoms reported were heart problems, neurological issues, and other chronic physical ailments. Excessive prescriptions, medical appointments, visits to emergency rooms, and extreme cases of PTSD were also listed.

In another study, rape and incest victims were found to have severe symptoms of PTSD, and only the victims of incest had chronic PTSD.


The research from one study revealed that patients with chronic pelvic pain also have somatic symptoms unexplained by anything organic, and the subjects also had a history of trauma and suffered dissociation.

Columbia University Medical Center confirms that at least one third of females with chronic pelvic pain have been sexually assaulted at some point of their life. The pain can feel as though it is deep inside the pelvic area, or it can feel close to the surface. It might come and go, in addition to being sharp or dull. People have described it as burning, crushing, a feeling of pressure, or like “pins-and-needles” inside the vagina.

I experienced that exact pain in my vagina for years, and it dissolved by regressing to the rapes during hypno-analysis, and by facing those rapes, and healing them at the subconscious level.

Traumatic experiences are strongly associated with physical problems that cannot be assigned to any organic disease. Physical abuse and threats to one’s life are also more linked to somatic dissociation.

People who completely dissociate from, or have repressed memories for, an abusive experience in childhood often have more physical symptoms than those who do not. Women who report a lesser amount of trauma, or none at all, display and report less psychological dissociation.

It is well documented that on-going physiological and psychological reactions to reminders of childhood trauma is a prime and common response to that trauma.

Dahlenberg found that delayed memories of abuse are as authentic as memories which have never been forgotten.


Journal of Nervous and Mental Disease, Psychiatric Disorders among Persecution Victims: A Contribution to the Understanding of Concentration Camp Pathology and its After-Effects, William G. Niederland, M.D. Vol 139, 1964, page 459
Holocaust Survivor’s Mental Health, T.L. Brink Ph.D. Editor, pages 22-23 (Also published as Clinical Gerontologist, Volume 14, Number 3 1994), 1994 Haworth Press, Inc. Birmingham NY
Traumatic Amnesia: The Evolution of Our Understanding From a Clinical and Legal Perspective, Charles Whitfield M.D., Sexual Addiction & Compulsivity, 4, 2, 1997
Dahlenberg, C. (1996, Summer) Accuracy, timing and circumstances of disclosure in therapy of recovered and continuous memories of abuse. The Journal of Psychiatry and Law.
Physical symptoms, posttraumatic stress disorder, and healthcare utilization of women with and without childhood physical and sexual abuse. Farley M, Patsalides BM Psychol Rep 2001 Dec; 89(3):595-606
 Nijenhuis ER, van Dyck R, ter Kuile MM, Mourits MJ, Spinhoven P, van der Hart O
J Psychosom Obstet Gynaecol 2003 Jun; 24(2):87-98.
The Compulsion to Repeat the Trauma Re-enactment, Revictimization, and Masochism, Bessel A. van der Kolk, MD Psychiatric Clinics of North America, Volume 12, Number 2, Pages 389-411,
June 1989.
The Body Keeps the Score: Memory and the Evolving Psychobiology of Post Traumatic Stress by Bessel van der Kolk MD. Harvard Medical School.
 Mayo Clinic
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Marilyn Van Derbur’s Story: Still Compelling and Still Powerful Evidence of Repression for Childhood Sexual Abuse

This article is very old, but still relevant today.

Did Daddy Really Do it?

~Los Angeles Times, Katy Butler

“On May 8, 1991, seven years after her father’s death, a graying, impeccably groomed former Miss America named Marilyn Van Derbur walked to a podium in a small auditorium on the University of Colorado’s Denver campus. Announcing a family gift of $260,000 to a university research program on child sexual abuse, the onetime Outstanding Woman Speaker in America said that her late father, Francis–a millionaire philanthropist whose name was inscribed on the local Boy Scout building–had repeatedly violated her between the ages of 5 and 18.

Marilyn and her father, who raped her from ages 5-18

Marilyn and her father. He raped her from ages 5-18

Van Derbur said she had no conscious memories of what her father had done to her until she was 24. She had coped, she said, by somehow splitting herself. A high-achieving “day child” skied, played the piano and studied hard–utterly failing to incorporate any awareness of a mute, terrified “night child” whose legs, she said, were repeatedly pried apart in the darkness by her father’s insistent hands.

Van Derbur thought she was speaking only to the people in the room that night, but a reporter was there taking notes. Her secret–the kind once taken to the grave or contained in the female domain of gossip–was about to cross the border into the public realm and become news.

Within a day or two, radio talk shows were debating whether she was lying, deluded or telling the truth. Her total “forgetting” of repeated horrors for many years seemed to defy common sense.”

My notes (in blue): It does not defy common sense, it makes sense that a person would totally block out incest when they came from a family where everything on the outside appeared normal, and the family members were functional in society, well-educated, or “respectable” members of the community.

Marilyn’s sister Gwen says she never repressed the incest her father perpetrated on her, and Gwen says she hated her father. Marilyn, who totally dissociated from the incest, says she loved her father, and her “body betrayed her” with her father. 

I believe the love Marilyn felt, and the hatred Gwen felt, contributed to one daughter repressing the rapes, and the other always remembering them.

I also find it interesting that Marilyn blocked out the incest and she is the one of the two sisters, who says her body experienced pleasure with her father. Not only is it highly common for a victim to experience pleasure during the physical contact with their abuser, but it is linked to repressed incest memories -due to the trauma bonding, the father/daughter incest emotional bond, and to attachment with the perpetrator… 



“Three days after the speech, Marilyn Van Derbur’s oldest sister, Gwen, an attorney in Hillsborough, Calif., told the Rocky Mountain News that she, too, had been molested by their father–but she had never forgotten. With that, most questions about Marilyn Van Derbur’s credibility and memory ended, and last year her father’s name was removed from the Denver Boy Scout building.”

I have a problem with those who would only believe Marilyn because her sister Gwen came forward. What about the hundreds of thousands of people who have no one else in the family to back them up? Are they any more, or less, credible? Not in my opinion.

Each and every case of repression should be taken on an individual basis. Marilyn’s story was very powerful without her sister coming forward. 

“If people aren’t going to believe 53 year-old me, then who by God, is going to believe a child?” ~Marilyn Van Derbur

Looks normal enough, right?

Looks normal enough, right?

“The revelations began in the 1980s at 12-step meetings for Adult Children of Alcoholics; they were whispered to a new generation of mostly female therapists whose clients were financially independent women. By 1994, more than 800,000 women had bought a self-help book called “The Courage to Heal.”

Repression and dissociation for childhood trauma has existed, been written about, and documented for hundreds of years.

“A window had opened, letting in darkness rather than light. Never before in history had so many women accused so many seemingly respectable men.

Little attention has been paid to the feelings of parents accused of abuse–either the innocent or the guilty. Now a comforting counter-explanation for the nation’s wave of incest revelation is being advanced: The problem is not abuse so much as an epidemic of false memories of it, fomented by therapists who suspect it when none has occurred.”

Anyone who is just beginning to recover from having been sexually abused, or if you are having memories of being sexually abused, or traumatized in childhood and have heard of a “false memory syndrome” …… I want you to know there is no scientific proof of any such syndrome, nor any documentation of massive cases of “false memories.”

The False Memory Syndrome Foundation was started in part by an admitted pedophile (Ralph Underwager), and by the parents of a highly respected psychology professor (Jennifer Freyd), who, as an adult, remembered being sexually abused by her father in childhood. Both her parents have denied Professor Freyd’s allegations, and they formed the “False Memory Syndrome Foundation” in retaliation of the accusations, and in my opinion, to silence sexual abuse survivors and child victims.

“Loftus, a cognitive psychologist and an eminent memory researcher at the University of Washington, is not a therapist but a hard scientist, an expert on the malleability of memory. She is skeptical of all therapeutic theories (such as the concept of “repression”) that have never been scientifically proven and skeptical of “recovered memories” of abuse because, as she writes in her book, she was secretly molested by a male baby-sitter when she was 6 and has never forgotten.”

Elizabeth Loftus was not traumatized. Loftus thinks that just because she did not repress an incident –an incident of molestation by a non-family member– that it means all cases of repression are false, or questionable. I have read Loftus’s account of the molestation, and it barely constitutes “abuse” in the true sense of the word.

Loftus has also made a good amount of money testifying for accused child abusers in court.

You can read about Loftus’s “memory research,” which was more like lying to children than research, by clicking here: Science-experiments-or-lying-to-children?

After twenty-three years of threats, intimidation, and frightening people who have been sexually abused, I am happy to say that the FMSF nearly has two feet out the door, and people who have stayed strong in standing up to them have helped to push them out that door.

As you can read at the website linked below, not only has total repression for incest, child sexual abuse, and other trauma been well-documented, but it has been corroborated many times through abuser confessions, other victims, eye-witnesses, journals, diaries, criminal and civil convictions, and other highly corroborating evidence:

Marilyn Van Derbur, continues to be a strong force for survivors of sexual abuse, and for children. I recommend her book very much:


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Pamela Anderson, Star, Model, and Victim of Sexual Abuse By Female Babysitter

For many years, I have kept a list of actors that I feel were probably sexually abused as young children, or raped as teens, and are repressing the memories or just not speaking publicly about it.

Pamela Anderson on Baywatch

Pamela Anderson on Baywatch

After reading that Pamela Anderson (Pamela Sue Anderson) star of Baywatch, former Playboy model, and the former wife of musician Tommy Lee, was sexually abused from ages 6-10 by her female, lesbian babysitter… I was not surprised at all. Pamela was one of the actresses I assumed may have a history of child sexual abuse.

My belief was based on her liver disease (liver is the seat of anger) and her over-sexualized persona.

Many people judge a person about their sexual appearance, or if they have posed for Playboy…but no one knows why a person is hyper-sexual, like Pamela was for many years. She was not only molested by a woman for years as a young child, she was raped as a teenager by a man, and several boys.

“At the risk of over exposing myself…again, possibly being inappropriate…again. I thought I might share with you events that, in surviving, drove me to this point right now. I did not have an easy childhood — Despite loving parents, I was molested from age 6-10 by my female babysitter.”

Pamela was raped by a friend’s 25 year-old brother when she was twelve, and gang-raped in the 9th grade.

Last year, Pamela told an audience at the Cannes Film Festival, that because of the lesbian babysitter’s abuse, being raped was “her first heterosexual experience.”


It wasn’t until she discovered her love of animals that she found a sense of purpose: “My loyalty remained with the animal kingdom. I vowed to protect them and only them. I prayed to the whales with my feet in the ocean. My only real friends — till I had children.”

Anderson, now an animal rights activist, says her parents thought the woman who molested her was “the greatest babysitter in the world.”

Pamela even went through terrible distress as a child, when she felt she was responsible for her molester’s death:

“I remember the last straw was when she told me there was no Santa Claus…So I ran after her full speed with a candy cane pen and tried to stab her in the heart. And it didn’t work. So all night long I wished her dead, I wished her dead, I wished her dead — and within 48 hours she died in a car crash.”

Pamela says her parents tried to keep her safe. But she says her father was an alcoholic, and her mother worked two jobs, so she never told them what the babysitter was doing to her:

“My mom was always crying, dad didn’t always come home, leaving us in tremendous pain and worry. I couldn’t bear to give her more disruptive information so I couldn’t break her heart any more than it was breaking.”

The former Baywatch star says she has, at times, wanted to vanish from the earth.

“Needless to say, I had a hard time trusting humans,” Anderson said. “I just wanted off this earth.”

Pamela’s connection to nature helped save her life, and she is now a strong advocate for animal rights.

Pamela’s story is NOTHING UNUSUAL. Please don’t assume a woman is safe to leave with your children. Use caution with ANYONE you intend to leave with your children. 95% of children never tell anyone they are being sexually abused –like Pamela, they wait until they are an adult, and when it is a female abuser, a woman can take it to her grave. 


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Self-Injury and Self-Punishment Are Often a Way of Life For Sexual Abuse Victims

March is self-injury awareness month. This is a re-publish from 2012…

Self-punishment, self-injury and self-sabotage in relation to having experienced pleasure during child sexual abuse is highly common.

This behavior can be linked to:

  • For women –feeling our father, brother, or step-father was our boyfriend and sex partner.
  • Having had orgasms with the perpetrator
  • The perpetrator behaved as though the victim is the sexual aggressor (to protect himself) and the mother often blames, abuses, or strikes at the child because they WANT to believe the child is at fault.

Throughout the latter part of my healing, I endured a tremendous amount of self-inflicted punishment for wanting to be with my father sexually, or for the times it felt good, or when I received attention and affection when he molested me.

People who self-punish often deprive themselves of things they enjoy –like the enjoyment of food, or by avoiding activities that make their heart sing.

More painful forms of self-punishment can be things like “accidentally” hitting yourself in the jaw, slicing numerous fingers with a knife or cheese grater while cooking, frequently bumping your head head, dropping breakable items, or biting your own tongue.

The most common form of self-inflicted physical harm is known as “cutting.” It is sometimes called “self-mutilation” or “self-abuse.” Cutting is usually carried out with a knife or other sharp object. It is estimated that fifty percent of those who commit this type of self-injury were physically or sexually abused as children.

Adult survivors of child sexual abuse inflict wounds on themselves for a number of different reasons. Each person is unique. However, self-harm can be associated with trying to fix what is “broken” inside. Sometimes it is done in order to stop emotional suffering, and instead, feel physical pain.

Self-injury can be done to release rage because the person cannot verbally express their emotions. Watching the blood for a while is common. The blood can be symbolic of feeling unable to express emotions in a normal manner. One woman who cuts herself said, “I wanted to make visible what I felt inside.” This is just another reason why it is crucial for victims of abuse to verbally express themselves.

Psychotherapist Steven Levenkron, M.S. and author of the book Cutting found that as much as ninety percent of those who self-injure came from families with a system of denial and from families that avoided anything unpleasant. These types of households usually deal with problems in silence. This lends support for the theory that the number of sexual abuse victims among those who cut themselves is probably much higher than what is reported. Families with a significant system of denial are ripe for an incest victim to develop Dissociative Amnesia (repressed memories) for trauma and sexual abuse.

One woman told me that just before she cuts herself she experiences extreme anticipation that is exciting, dangerous, and sexual. Feeling excitement while cutting may be a way of punishing herself for enjoying the sexual stimulation with her abuser. For this woman, the danger, sexual pleasure, and the excitement, may have brought deep shame about enjoying what her rational mind told her she should not have liked.

Women I spoke with who perform self-injury said this form of violence is often a way of trying to remove the part of them that initiated the guilt, trauma, and suffering. They are literally trying to cut out what they feel is the cause of their grief. They try to sever the genitals or breasts like they are trying to amputate an arm or leg.

Van der Kolk did a study on patients who had problems with self-injury. Each subject indicated that a safe environment in therapy, facing the truths about their childhood experiences, and how they responded to those experiences, are what helped them become strong over their memories and what enabled them to stop the self-mutilation.

People who have been sexually abused as children cannot fully heal without dealing with any shame, guilt, and self-worth issues related to having taken pleasure in some of the sexual acts, or having had orgasms with their perpetrator.

Please know that you are not alone. Countless victims experience this –probably most victims do.


Hearing the Survivor’s Voice: Sundering the Wall of Denial, Sandra Bloom, Journal of Psychohistory, Vol 21, Number 4, Spring 1994, page 467]
Self-injury Poorly Understood Problem, Dana Sullivan, September 5, 2000, Web posted at: 1:28 PM EDT (1728 GMT), Copyright 2000 by Healtheon/WebMD
The Compulsion to Repeat the Trauma Re-enactment, Revictimization, and Masochism, Bessel A. van der Kolk, MD Psychiatric Clinics of North America, Volume 12, Number 2, Pages 389-411,
June 1989.
Posted in Child Abuse, child molestation, child sexual abuse, evil, Headlines, Health, News, rape and abuse | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 8 Comments

Bruce Jenner: Guilty of “Man Slaughter?”

This is part three, in a three-part posting of articles having to do with ‘transgenderism.’ The reason I am posting these articles is the shocking nature of the stories –especially Bruce Jenner’s story– and because of the influence he, and others, can have on the minds of innocent children.

–Bruce Jenner, former Gold Medal winner in the decathlon in the 1976 Summer Olympics, was once an archetype of masculinity.

bruce_jenner_custodyJenner adorned the cover of a box of Wheaties Cereal and was featured on the cover of Playgirl.

Today, Bruce Jenner wants to ‘become a woman,’ and faces manslaughter charges in the death of 69 year-old Kim Howe, who was traveling along Pacific Coast Highway in Malibu California on February 7th of this year when Jenner slammed into the back of her vehicle. Ms. Howe was pushed into on-coming traffic, struck by a large SUV, and killed.

spl943664-001A mass-transit bus captured the crash on video, and the evidence shows that Jenner was not in control of his vehicle, and was either traveling too closely behind Ms. Howe, or was speeding.

There is a pending investigation by the Malibu Sheriff’s Department, but Jenner could face manslaughter charges, in the wake of reports that he has recently had facial reconstructive surgery to look more feminine, and that he has been growing breasts, and dressing like a woman.

Jenner is also reported to have taped an interview with 20/20‘s Diane Sawyer, which has not aired yet, but will allegedly disclose his decision to take hormonal drugs, and have some kind of ‘transgender surgery,’ to “become a woman,” –most likely involving the self-mutilation of his sex organs.

If true, the interview will most likely glorify, normalize, or even encourage transgenderism, and will be part of the on-going mass movement to symbolically slaughter the role of men and their masculinity.

No matter what the media, or feminists, or Hollywood, or the ‘socially correct’ crowd tells society…no human being can “change their sex.”


Bruce Jenner is a man, and will always be a man. He was born with male chromosomes, and no amount of self-mutilation by having surgery procedures done on his sex organs, will change that fact.

Self-mutilation via surgery, hormonal and other dangerous prescription drugs -in order to identify with the opposite sex (or to lie to one’s self with transgenderism)- are all merely a cover-up for deep psychological neurosis, or emotional pain and trauma, and it is often not consciously remembered by the person.


It is horrific that Jenner and the media want to promote this monstrous act he is planning –promote it as a natural, normal thing that children ought to also do one day if they happen to be sexually confused inside themselves –confused for psychological reasons that have been deeply embedded into the subconscious mind of the person, or child.

Bruce Jenner needs to face his neurosis, any past trauma, or any kind of emotional need that has made him identify with the opposite sex.

Just like Chaz Bono, Bruce Jenner is no role model for children. He needs to be kept away from children’s minds. Jenner is NOT a woman -in his head, or otherwise. He is a man who needs serious psychotherapy to find the root cause of why, as a child, he felt feminine, or related to the women in his childhood. He may have even been sexually abused by someone as a young boy.

Bruce Jenner, because of his psychological state. might also be the cause of the death of the woman he rear-ended in the car crash.

Jenner says he “felt like a woman” since he was age five.

Children at that age have no rational understanding of sex, so his childhood feelings could very well be rooted in some kind of need for attention, which he might have seen his two sisters receiving more of –or possibly Jenner saw that the women in his family could do things he could not, like with their hair and clothing. It is possible that, as a child, he wanted the ability to act and look female.

This childhood experience is not synonymous with the need to have sex with men, or to cut off your genitals, and grow breasts.


Maybe his father paid more attention to his sisters –and he craved his father’s attention? Who knows? Parents, siblings, and other relatives, can have very powerful influences on children, and those experiences and feelings embed themselves into the subconscious mind of the child, and remain there as an adult.

Bruce Jenner was once an attractive man, and a strong male athlete when he was young, so any need for attention, and self-aggrandizement would have been fulfilled during his career as a young, famous athlete.

But what happens to a person, who has an attention-deficit neurosis when they begin to age so much that they can no longer attract sexual, or athletic, attention to themselves?

–Especially notable is Jenner’s role in the television reality series, Keeping Up With the Kardashians which I have never seen, but my guess is that Bruce is downplayed and minimized by the young, attractive women on the show.

What better way for his subconscious mind to gain that needed attention, and to fulfill an emotional need to be a woman, than to go through hormonal and surgical changes, and to announce on National television, that you are going to “change your sex?”

Interestingly, after Jenner’s world-wide success at the Olympics, his little brother was killed in a car crash. It is highly possible that the attention Jenner received for being an Olympic Gold Medal winner, was taken away from him -within his family dynamics- when his little brother was tragically killed.

Evidence of Jenner’s ego-driven mind can be found at his future website, where he calls himself, “the world’s greatest athlete.”

I fear that his future website was meant to promote transgenderism and to influence the minds of children who would have looked up to him as a role model. If so, the car crash put that on hold.

Modern-day neuroscientists are discovering the power of the subconscious and how much it drives, and can control our lives. The subconscious mind drives most of our actions and decisions. An unhealed subconscious mind can cause illness and disease, and serious psychological disorders, and can even cause a person to have a car accident.

Jenner’s soul is tortured. He needs to find the root cause -in his subconscious mind. The car crash may have been his soul’s warning flag that he is NOT at peace, and in great turmoil inside himself and either wants to die, or wanted to try and stop this insane idea of ‘becoming a woman’ through self-mutilation and to stop it in any way he can…even by subconsciously getting into a major car crash.

But most people are not willing to truly look into the darkness of their own soul, and most do not have the courage to face that darkness, and then to heal it in a true, dynamic, and natural way. This is because it takes hard work, time, and a willingness to face one’s deepest secrets and most devastating emotional pain.

Cutting up one’s body, and taking drugs are easier, faster, and they cater to the disturbing world we live in –a world where the false idea that our bodies, desires, emotions, and elemental nature are ‘who we truly are,’ and this belief has been instilled into the minds of Americans through people like Lady Gaga, Madonna, the mainstream media, feminism, the gay and lesbian movement, Hollywood, and by entertainment and fashion magazines.

Even your own tax dollars are contributing to the promotion of transgenderism, gay and lesbianism, abortion, and sexual promiscuity for children in organizations funded with U.S. Government Grants that directly target the youth.

bruce-jenner-hair-browny-locksNo one can say what the root cause of Jenner’s issue is, but Bruce Jenner’s soul knows, and the only way to penetrate the soul is by delving into the subconscious mind.

Every human being has the potential to go within and become self-aware, and heal themselves, and every person has the ability within themselves to become powerful human beings –but with their inner God-given power– not with drugs and surgery, or debauchery and self-indulgences.

Bruce Jenner is just one more tortured soul, who is told by certain groups with a monstrous agenda, and told by the mainstream media and by dangerous psychologists, and by the entertainment industry that he should commit public mutilation instead of going within his own subconscious mind and finding out why he is driven to destroy his life by slaughtering his own masculinity.

Bruce Jenner’s subconscious impulses, unhealed emotional traumas, and sexual confusion quite possibly were responsible for the car crash, and the death of the woman in Malibu.

Now, instead of Bruce having surgery to slaughter the image and likeness of the male form and slaughtering his masculinity, he might very well be charged with vehicular manslaughter.

True transformation cannot be done with knives and hormonal drugs, or with painted nails, or women’s clothing.

True transformation comes from within.

If Jenner decides to go ahead with these drugs and surgeries, he will no longer be human, but a monster.

When a person uses mind/body altering drugs and body deforming -self-mutilating- surgeries in a futile attempt to “change genders” they become sub-human.

If you are having sexual identity issues, please contact Dr. De Saint Simone, through me, by emailing me at

Dr. De Saint Simone helped me heal from illnesses and diseases doctors say have no cure. Dr. De Saint Simone completely changed the life of a former “lesbian”, named Grace, who found my Blog when she was struggling with severe problems because she thought she was “lesbian.”

Dr. De Saint-Simone can help anyone who wants to free themselves from gender dysfunction, illness, disease, or from most any kind of psychological problem.


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